Reboot / Restart

“Behold, I will do something new, Now it will spring forth;Will you not be aware of it? I will even make a roadway in the wilderness,Rivers in the desert.”

Isaiah 43:19 (NASB)

9 days in Palawan now but the feeling is still surreal, the whole thing haven’t sunk in yet. I am still wishing that I was just here for 1-month vacation and I’ll be back to my second home after 3 weeks.

I have a house but I can’t call it a home. Here I am sitting in a coffeeshop, figuring out what to do tomorrow or the next day. I always make myself occupied everyday to forget what’s really on my hand – being unemployed, just expectant with what tomorrow will bring. I hear GOD but there is this childlike in me that I refuse to hear. Often arguing with HIM and most of time requesting to HIM that HE return me back to the people I have learned to love and I call my family.

When the reality is slowly presenting itself everyday, the more I am hesitant to embrace it, refusing to accept it. I wish i wake up from this reality at the soonest and be in my dream. Skip all the process and be at peace in one place. I am in my Peniel, I can’t deny that fact. I know HE will win or HE won rather but still discussing the possibilities and what ifs.

Daddy GOD, I am sorry for feeling like these towards Your way. Give me a heart that is so submissive and just enjoy this phase. I am not worried nor anxious though, just wishful.

Your Daughter,


Captive in Iran

I just finished reading this wonderful book and I can’t fathom the depth of its impact to me as follower of Christ. This book was written by two brave, faithful, zealous and on-fire Daughters of GOD. Their story, what they’ve been through is really remarkable and inspiring. Their heart and eagerness to share GOD’s love, grace and mercy to their fellow countrymen is really encouraging.

This book is the story of two Iranian women (Maryam and Marzieh), who both seek for the truth and both met and continue experiencing the TRUTH. Both were very determined to share the love that they found in GOD that their former belief never even tackled. Both have the heart to make a difference in the community they belong and share the new relationship they found in JESUS. They want to share this by meeting with their people, talking to them and sharing what they received has made a turn of their life. They gave away New Testament Bible to people they met discreetly. Little did they know they were being monitored and spied on by authorities. Later on, these authorities who are spying on them plot a scenario that put them in jail. And this was the turn of a grand design of GOD to their passion and heart. In the prison, they met different kind of women who are dealing with different issues in their life, mostly victims of the society and culture who have little regard with women. They were faced with different difficulties due to broken system that favors the power and who is in power. They took this opportunity to open and introduce their faith to their fellow prisoners. Prayer was a huge factor to penetrate even the hardest hardest broken hearts in their quest to honor and show GOD that they are partners with HIM. Almost all the prayers they lift up to GOD were answered that made these recipients all the more believed that Maryam and Marzieh’s GOD is alive and very caring. Through these answered prayers, these women felt loved, protected and for the first time, they felt that they were not ignored, that they are special.

Finishing the book made me think of my current partnership with Daddy GOD. It made me think a lot of ways how to be this on-fire for HIM. Talking behind the pulpit is not enough, serving is not enough, transporting brethren is not enough, reading and mastering the Bible is not enough… has to be something big, it has to be something extraordinary, it has to be something bold and scary and dangerous and bone wrenching act. I desire to be used in a way that I couldn’t imagine. I desire to be extraordinary for HIS Kingdom thinking that all HIS creation is important to HIM and should be with HIM…..for HIS glory, for HIM, through HIM and to HIM….one day!

Eversince, I met Jesus, it has been my desire to be _________! Paul was trained by Jesus for three (3) years in the wilderness (Galatians 1:11-24) and look how he have turned! It is taking ages for me but I believe it, in JESUS’ Name. Amen!

The Joy in a Sprout

I am currently living in Middle East, Bahrain specifically, wherein she only have 2 seasons – the super summer and winter. Summer is from late March to Early December and winter is from late December to early March. I like winter more than summer of course because of the many nice things that I benefit during this season:
– lower electricity consumption
– lower petrol (car) consumption
– you don’t get burn when you go outside
– people are not that smelly (hehehe…..)
– the air is fresher
– the plants are healthy and smiling

And the opposite of all of the above is summer which has the most months in every year. But it is during summer when i get to eat most nice fruits and some veggies that I like. So every other Saturday; me, Chrissy, Tita Aida and Tita Babes go to Manama Central Market coz there is where we can buy a fresh and cheaper produce.

At home I don’t throw away the seeds of fruits and vegetables that I cook and prepare. I dry them instead. After couple of weeks I will plant it to my mini garden at my terrace. Sometimes it’s kinda trial and error thing if these seeds will sprout and grow because it is really really hot in the summer in this part of the world. So when I see a sprout… joy!!!!

What can I learn from the sprout?  Why do I have joy within me?

  • GOD’s righteousness and faithfulness

Isaiah 61:11 (NASB), “For as the earth brings forth its sprouts,
And as a garden causes the things sown in it to spring up,
So the Lord God will cause righteousness and praise
To spring up before all the nations.

  • Hope

Job 14:7 (NASB), ““For there is hope for a tree,
When it is cut down, that it will sprout again,
And its shoots will not fail.

And in this side of the world which summer can be as hot as 50 degrees, it is impossible to have plants grow coz even the water use for watering is also hot.  That is why the moment that seed show up a promising grin/green, that is something!


Someone Parked on my Parking…..tsk tsk!

As the title implies, there is indeed someone parked on my parking. There is something in my parking really that people, neighbors, visitors in the building, etc. just love to park with. I can’t figure what it is but really keep me always wondering. Most of the times I just ignored it and I try to find another parking.

BUT tonight was different! I parked behind the cars that was parked on my parking(since Elias is long so it occupied two and a half parking space therefore, will give them a “NO getting out at all” scenario and another). I am sure that all of us will be inconvenienced tomorrow morning. The other car will also have difficulty getting out because it will kiss intimately the side of it which if he is a good driver, he’ll find a way to somehow manage to get out.

Why did I park behind these cars?
1. If the person who parked on my parking lives on the same building then he/she will get one or two (you know!?!?) words of wisdom from me. And if he/she lives in the building that means he is sharing the flat to somebody else who happen to have his parking already. This guy is new in the building.
2. It is my parking eversince I moved in this building. MINE!!
3. There is no available parking anymore because all houses in this village seems to be having more than 2 cars. If there is available parking, it is far from the building, I have to walk which i don’t like to do. Why? These people go to work tomorrow and they’ll leave the parking unoccupied and shaded. Not right!
4. I don’t want to wake up early just to move Elias to his proper parking.
5. If this person is just a neighbor then it’ll be his/her lesson not to park on somebody else parking anymore.

It’s 2:30am, can’t sleep because of this and I am pretty sure that tomorrow I will be awaken by a call or a doorbell. Let’s see what will happen!

But hopefully, hopefully, hopefully…..I will not lose it!

Alright…..see print ads for details! ^____^

Random 103

I have an encounter with one client yesterday, “and men….” I told myself. People who are allergic to people who do / making mistakes or afraid of making mistakes (in short….perfectionist??) are so unhappy people (I think!). They’re the ones who are close to 6 feet under the ground coz their enthusiasm is so little that their heart doesn’t have an exercise. I would assume as well that these kind of people are looking far far from their age because they only know one expression….poker face! There is a dog who look like that….what’s it called again? “bulldog”

Also, long exposure to these kind of people will make you one as well. It’s contagious…be careful!

“Contagious” —- I remember during my college days. I used to live in a boarding house, a room with 6 occupants. I was then a very “me, myself and I” person. Show off who I am. Don’t care if I make friends or not….kinda like “this is me, want me or hate me” person. So, if I am upset, I am upset! If I like you, I like you! If i don’t like you, I don’t like you! So here comes a test to this behaviour/attitude…..I have a clash with a boardmate. Didn’t talk for almost a month (just for a silly reason really?!). Then I think she had enough so she indirectly say to me (she is actually telling it to me but she is talking to the instant noodle that she is cooking), “I hate this behaviour, this is contagious! No wonder you don’t have friends!”

Wow….that changed me totally in dealing with people. I don’t want to be contagious in a bad way, it’s not a good asset isn’t it? So I broke my pride and talk to her the afternoon. Everything’s fine from then on and I am pretty sure that we’ll just laugh at this when we talk about it.

So yeah….for people who have such an attitude, I can only tell you my experience and what I’ve learned. It is still your choice. But isn’t it nice if you are being called contagious but in a good way? Contagious laugh. Contagious beauty. Etc. Etc.

Ciao….stay strong and happy y’all!!!

Self – Evaluation ✔︎

My life is perfect! ✘
My currect situation is desirable! ✘
I am work in progress! ✔︎
I need life-auditing! ✔︎
There is nothing wrong with me, I am perfectly fine! ✘
I am totally human! ✔︎
I look at others life or situation as something more serious than my own situation! ✘

These questions were inspired by the conversation we have awhile ago on the way home. Regarding this mother-daughter situation where the daughter always looks fancy and buys expensive clothes while she never give to her mom. Then on my way home, there was an idea / “other sense” that passed through telling me and asking me that, “Claire you talked about these people like your life is perfect! Like your situation is desirable and nothing wrong with it! You talked about them like they are not talking about you and your situation as well when you are not around.”

Wow! It was really humiliating and demoralizing. I totally agree! Why can’t I just shut my mouth and mind my own business? I have my own issues in life to deal with?! I am no perfect at all (well, I never said I am)! It is just this human nature in which we are all far-sighted, we can be able to see the flaws and what’s wrong with the situation of others like there is nothing wrong with our situation. There was this verse in the Bible where it says, “For if anyone thinks he is something when he is nothing, he deceives himself.” (Galatians 6:3 NASB).

I am guilty as charged! And mind you it takes gut to admit that you are wrong. And I thank that moment when the “other sense” just talked to me like that and told stuff that I sometimes don’t realize and make me realize. But of course , don’t just stop with realization, it should be topped with action as well.  When there is a circumstance like that, you change your way of thinking about others. You change yourself from becoming hypocrite. You improve and be transformed from being “others-evaluator” to “self-evaluator”.

Psalm 139:1 (NASB) says, “O Lord, You have searched me and known me.” HE (GOD) only knows who we are; our thoughts, our circumstances, what we are undergoing through, our difficulties, our goings and comings, our everything. So who I am I to judge or evaluate others situation or circumstances, right? My job is to love, to show compassion, to care, to encourage, etc. Anyway, Romans 8:28 (NASB) says, “And we know that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose.”

Maybe their situation is how GOD deals with them to their way to maturity. Maybe GOD is allowing their situation to draw them closer to HIM and become dependent to HIM that without HIM we are nothing or we can do nothing. Why would I assume that GOD gave me the task of checking other’s life? My life is not perfect at all! It has flaws here and there and who knows that is how HE deals with me also to know that I am such a wretched woman who needs saving daily, who needs GOD’s grace and mercy daily. I am not at all entitled to give any opinion about other’s life or choices in life. I have no right!

And that I am thankful indeed for this “other sense” checking on me to evaluate myself and what’s wrong with how I view others.

I’ve learned….

This is a compilation of the many lessons I’ve learned through life since I can remember! Sharing them as I’ve wrote them first (no date mentioned but in my calculation, year 2004!) Don’t judge! ;-P ^_^

I’ve learned that….
….when you find the best company, you’ll live with them forever.
….the true hapiness is found in the presence of the LORD.
….it is not easy to let go of a TRUE FRIEND.
….it is not enough that you have education, you also must have good relationship with people.
….you’ll still be dependent with your parents even after you graduated college.
….if you have fought to a certain person, it takes time to heal and forget the issue.
….love will conquer all even the biggest failure you’ve committed.
….the best way of forgetting your problems is by listening inspirational songs with Christian lyrics.
….Word of GOD fattens your spiritual worthiness.
….GOD is the BEST Friend you’ll ever find.
….in every happiness there is always loneliness.
….when you get even with someone, you’ll just letting that someone continue to hurt you.
….there are people who like you just because they want something from you.
….real people are hard to find.
….you’ll find true happiness when you’ve accepted JESUS in your life.
….it is relieving when you accomplished one of your plans.
….if it’s not GOD’s will, whatever it is you do, you’re not satisfied.
….a person with no love, no sincerity is seen.
….having a degree is not enough to say that you’ve proven your worth being a student unless you’ve gotten a job with that degree.

Kinda felt like 1% of King Solomon here. ^_^